Monday 28 January 2019

Right or wrong ?


Last Monday, I was conducting a motivational workshop for a group of nurses. I follow the methodology of experience sharing and real life situation discussions. Most of the times, the solution to the problems are discovered by the participants themselves  from these discussions. And for me, this experience sharing is a great learning tool.  

In this post, I will share one incident which was shared in this workshop. It left an impact on my mind and made me wonder about what is right and what is wrong. 

Durga Puja is the biggest festival in Bengal. It is actually a sort of four day carnival , where the Bengalis just freak out. They wear colourful new dresses, indulge in eating , music , dance, drama , meeting relatives and exchanging gifts . The offices, school and colleges  are closed at least for a week and many people plan their vacation around that. It is also quite difficult to get doctors and nurses during that time. 

This being a Government run hospital, the nurses have to adjust their leaves so that there is a minimum strength in each shift.  Just a day before the start of the Puja, an old lady was brought in the hospital by her son. She had severe diarrhea,  he said.  After a while, the son left, saying that some emergency has cropped up at home and he had to leave immediately. 

The old lady, around 80 years old was admitted and given a bed in the general ward.  She was hard of hearing and could not walk without anyone's support. When asked any question, she gaped at the nurses , nodded her head and smiled.  It seemed that she was enjoying the company of the nurses. She sat on her bed, smiling, looking around her. She waved at the person lying on the next bed beside her.  At night she was given soup and khichdi (rice and pulses boiled together in a mush ). The old lady ate it with relish and had a good night's sleep. 

The next day, the nurse came and asked her "How are you feeling " ?

She said " uhh ? " 

The nurse raised her voice, came near her ears and repeated the question. 

She smiled.

"I am fine " , she smiled her toothless smile.

"During the night, how many times did you go to the washroom ?"

She raised her finger and said "Once". 

"But you are suffering from diarrhea, isn't it ? "

She smiled again, shook her head and said "Na To !" (It Means not at all in Bengali "

"Oh ! But your son admitted you for that !" The nurse was surprised. 

"Na, Na ... My son, daughter-in-law and my small grandson have gone to visit Darjeeling. They have got leave now.  There is no one at home to look after me, so they have brought me here... They will be back after two days ..."

When the nurse recounted this incident, many other nurses said that they too have had similar experiences. 

It was quite shocking for me. How could someone just abandon their mother like that , that too telling a lie. As this thought came to my mind, I tried to put myself in his son's shoes and tried out the "empathy" experiment which I do in,my workshops.  Well, the son thought that this was the best way to take care of his mother and also please his wife and son. 

But, what is right and what is wrong ? 

In some religion like Islam and Christianity, there is this concept of the Judgement day, where when a person dies, he or she is judged according to the rules laid down by the religion. Based on these, it is decided whether he will go to heaven or hell. 

In Hinduisim, there is no such concept. Here, every act has a consequence. And it is not always necessary that good act will have a good consequence and vice versa.  For example, in Gita,when Arjuna says that he cannot kill his own uncles and relatives,  Krishna tells Arjuna that the consequence of this bad act will be good. Hinduism tells us that the action is in your hands but the consequence is not.  During this life or after rebirth or after many births, the balance has to be struck.  It is like a balance sheet. The actions and consequences will always be matched. 

If I look from a moral angle, the son has done a wrong deed, by lying and almost abandoning his mother in a unknown place. But if I look from his practical and worldly angle,  he had done his best to keep everyone happy. 


Readers, what do you think ? Right or wrong ?

Sunday 13 January 2019

The smartest advise to manage your boss - The Nandi Effect

There are three kinds of people in this world. 

One who gets along with their boss . 

Second who are at logger head with their boss.

And the third kind who can manage their boss to suit mutual needs and get the work done. 

It is the rarest of the rare cases when the boss and the subordinate really really gel along naturally with each other. Usually the first kind of people are bootlickers and they are forever lying prostrate in front of their bosses, ready to do anything which their lord fancies. They are the typical "Yes managers" who neither have self respect and they turn their backs immediately once they understand that their boss has lost his position or power.  Their loyalty changes with the blink of an eye. 

The second kind of people never ever get along with their bosses. Since you cannot choose your boss, these kind of people's stay in the organization is usually short-lived. 

And then finally the third kind of people who manage their bosses.  These are the people who can make things happen, give valuable and correct feedback diplomatically and grow in their jobs. They stay in the system to make positive changes. 

In this blog post, I will talk about one very important tip to become the third kind of person. I call this the "Nandi Effect". 

For the readers who are not familiar with the Indian mythology, I will elaborate about "Nandi", the bull. 

Nandi the bull is one of the most iconic and well-known characters in Hindu mythologyThe most common depiction of Nandi is a sitting bull with folded limbs. He is either black or white colored and wears a necklace with a bell. He provides the music to which Lord Shiva performs the Tandava or the cosmic creation dance.

There is hardly any Shiva temple which does not have the idol of Nandi in front of the main temple of Shiva.  And there is a curious custom.  

Before entering the Shiva shrine, the devotees whisper their prayers and wishes in the ears of Nandi. This ensures that their prayers get answered. 

How intuitive , isn't it ?

For you to be able to get your way with the boss, look around and figure out the people who are the closest to her.  The subordinates who are working with her for the day to day work , like her personal assistant, the person who is running miscellaneous errands for him, the subordinate who is the closest to her . 

Make them your friends. 
Take them into confidence . 
Gain their trust . 
Do it slowly over a period of time. 

These people are very important. 

There will be occasions when there are  some important decisions to be discussed with your boss. Something which is important for you or a bit out of the way which can be only handled by your boss.  In such similar situations, you should whisper your point and wish in the ears of your  boss's Nandi. 

If your rapport with the "Nandi" is good, then he will whisper your wishes in the boss's ears at the opportune time. Or he will tell you whether it will cut well with the boss or not and what might be the best way and the best time to put across your point of view. 

Remember, it is important to be honest and show your integrity. If ever your are found to be double crossing , you are doomed. 

So , go ahead and find the Nandi of your boss and see how smoothly you can manage your career moves !

A happy new year to all my readers and hope to be writing regularly. 

Your cheers and feedback will give me fuel to write better . 

So, do feed in your comments and let me know whether you like the posts or not !


Sunday 30 September 2018

The "Why" of Life

I was conducting a session on Stress Management for an organization. 

 During the break, I saw a participant of the workshop standing near me as if hesitating to talk to me.  He was in his mid thirties and had a peaky and disturbed look on his face.  As if I had not noticed, I kept on going nearer to him , talking to other people. And as I had guessed, one he found me alone, he came up to me and said " Mam, just wanted to tell you that your session is going on very well, but somehow , I don't know why, I can't relate with the things being said  ..I have recently lost my wife ... I don't see any point in going on further with my life ... I have nothing to expect from life anymore ... "

I found it very very disturbing. 

And in the next session of the workshop, I talked about the book by Victor  E Frankl , "Man's Search for Meaning "

Victor Emil Frankl (1905 – 1997) was a Austrian neurologist, psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor, devoted his life to studying, understanding and promoting “meaning.” His famous book, Man’s Search for Meaning, tells the story of how he survived the Holocaust by finding personal meaning in the experience, which gave him the will to live through it. He went on to later establish a new school of existential therapy called logotherapy, based in the premise that man’s underlying motivator in life is a “will to meaning,” even in the most difficult of circumstances

The key lesson's are these :

1. “He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.”

Frankl and his fellow prisoners had to endure atrocities that many of us cannot even imagine. Prisoners had to survive on one small piece of bread a day and maybe some thin soup. They had to work 20 hours each day, digging and laying railroads and so on. If you looked weak, you were beaten. If you stopped working, you were beaten. And you didn’t get much of a second chance after that. You could be killed for any reason. Frankl talks about one inmate that had a dream that the war would be over on March 30th. He told this to Frankl at the beginning of the month and had hopes that his dream was a premonition that would come true. However, on the 29th, when no sense of an ending was coming, this inmate became ill. On March 31st, Frankl writes that “his prophecy came true and he died”. The war was over for him.
To all outward appearances, he had died of typhus. It wasn’t typhus that had killed him. It was his loss of hope.  On the other hand, there was an inmate who had a small kid waiting for him. He had a purpose to live and he lived. 
2. "Love is the ultimate and the highest goal to which a man can aspire"
Frankl himself endured the camps by thinking constantly of his wife who had been separated from him long ago and sent to a female camp. Even in the harshest parts of the day, exhausted, sleep-deprived, overworked, underfed, Frankl found salvation in the love that he had for his wife: "But my mind clung to my wife’s image, imaging it with an uncanny acuteness. I heard her answering me, saw her smile, her frank and encouraging look. Real or not, her look was then more luminous than the sun which was beginning to rise"
Frankl learned that love really does conquer all. The sadistic guards could do anything they liked to him. It didn’t matter. He had his loving wife’s image in his mind for company. Love was an antidote to pain.
3. "Suffering too has a meaning"

Frankl argued that we always have the freedom to find meaning through meaningful attitudes even 
in apparently meaningless situations. For example, an elderly, depressed patient who could not 
overcome the loss of his wife was helped by the following conversation with Frankl:

Frankl asked "What would have happened if you had died first, and your wife would have had to  survive you ?"

"Oh," replied the patient, "for her this would have been terrible; how she would have suffered!"

Frankl continued, "You see such a suffering has been spared her; and it is you who have spared her  this suffering; but now, you have to pay for it by surviving her and mourning her." 

The man said no word, but shook Frankl's hand and calmly left his office. 

There are three ‘whys’ that stand out from Frankl’s writing:
·         Love 
·         Work 
·         Dignity in suffering

We have likely heard many people utter these words from a concentration camp prisoner:

 “I have nothing to expect from life anymore”. 

In fact, we have probably uttered these words ourselves.

Many of our own darkest moments look positively radiant when compared to that which POWs like Frankl had to endure .....

So if ever you lose hope, think about Frankl and find the "Why" of your life  and say "Yaay " to life !



Thursday 20 September 2018

How to outperform in stressful situations - Autopilot !


Last week I conducted a test on Principles of Management for Calcutta University. After the exam, before calling it a day, I went to the wash room to freshen myself. There I found one of the brightest students of the class , sobbing and after seeing me , tried to camouflage her grief by splashing water on her face. I pretended ignorance and did not ask her anything. After a few minutes, suddenly she blurted out "Mam, why does this always happen to me ? I study so hard , so so well in class participation but when I am appearing for a test, my mind goes blank. I try so hard to concentrate , do well , but usually I buckle under the pressure. Why mam, why ? " And she cried inconsolably.  I just held her tight . 

This blog is dedicated to all of us who at some time or the other have choked under pressure - just like the bright young student of mine. 

So why does it happen? Why do we sometimes fail to perform up to what we're capable of when the pressure is on? It may not be so surprising to hear that in stressful situations, we worry. We worry about the situation, the consequences, what others will think of us. But what is surprising is that we often get in our own way precisely because our worries prompt us to concentrate too much ! 
 
That's right -- we pay too much attention to what we're doing. When we're concerned about performing our best, we often try and control aspects of what we're doing that are best left  outside our conscious awareness, and the consequence is that we mess up.

I remember my meeting with Anand Kumar - the celebrated educationist who is best known for his Super 30 program. The program claims to select 30 meritorious and talented candidates each year from economically backward sections of society and trains them for the IIT Joint entrance exams - one of the toughest exam in the country.  Super 30 has a hit rate of 99.99 % success. As an answer to my question that what was the secret of the stupendous success of Super 30 , the gentleman had smiled and softly said "Leave yourself  on autopilot at the time of the final performance !"

"What ? Autopilot ?" , I was confused. 

He smiled again . 

"Yes ! The key is to practice and build yourself up so that you are at your peak performance at the moment when it is needed the most. At that time, your mind should work automatically, unconsciously, without having to concentrate or worry about the result. That is autopilot mode !".

The stress of wanting to do really well makes you self-conscious, Your mind is  driven by worry, fear, and anxiety. Your over focus becomes a force of destruction that interferes with your natural and practiced flow as you start paying too much attention to what you're doing. And then starts the downhill journey of your performance.

Our working memory, just like a computer's Random Access Memory (RAM), is a limited resource. When we start letting anxious, worried thoughts intrude in our brain, we deplete major mental resources that could be better used anywhere else than over-thinking  every move.

So,  what should we do ? Here are some tips which I have gathered from my own personal experiences.  I share them below : 

1. Practice Under Stress : Good and sincere people work hard for tests, practice before performances . But it is important to keep in mind whether they are performing under stress or not. For example, if we are appearing for an exam,  we have to practice writing mock tests and try to emulate the same environment of the actual tests - like time limitations, writing conditions and evaluate ourselves on that. Before any performance on stage or presentation to customers or senior management  , we should practice in front of somebody who can critique us. If no one is available, record your performance and scrutinize yourself.  And of course it goes without saying that you have to Practice, Practice and Practice , till you feel that you are ready for the autopilot mode !

2. Do not dwell on the past and neither in the future :  Take failures as hurdles which have helped you to learn how to go about problems . Do not let them stop you from trying again. Dream big but do not  dwell on what might happen in future. I know it is easier said than done but living in the present moment is what we all should strive for.  Once you have the answer paper infront of you or the moment you are standing in front of an audience, live the moment. You have already practiced a lot . So come in the autopilot mode - live the moment. Remember Shah Rukh Khan's talk to his tennis team just before the final match? Forget the past and the future. Live the minute. Enjoy the moment !

3. Distract Yourself :  I know a person who always wears the same tie when he is going for an important client presentation.  There are people who have superstitions like humming a tune before the exam starts or keeping a flower or  a leaf with themselves before any important event. All these may be superstitions, hang on, I am not a proponent of superstitions , but as an example of busying our mind somewhere else, I say that they also serve the purpose of distracting our minds and prevents us from focusing too much on the consequences and the upcoming stressful situation.  This is one of the reasons that you might have heard your elders say that do not study on the day before the examination. Read a book, listen to a song etc. so that your mind is distracted. This slight distraction helps us cope up with the stressful situation and come to our super efficient autopilot mode !


What happens in our heads really matters, and knowing this, we can learn how to prepare ourselves and others for success, not just in the classroom and stage  but in the  boardroom as well.



Thursday 30 August 2018

Sophia and Me - Artificial Intelligence, Machine Learning, Deep Learning


It was 7.30 pm and raining heavily.  I stood in front of the Seminar hall  waiting for my Uber. 

I checked my smartphone .  

My cab was just about 1 minute away.  It arrived and I swiftly ran from the shade of the outer atrium of the hall towards the gate, got into the taxi and heaved a sigh of relief.  

But my relief was very short lived. 

“Let’s go !”  I said.

The Uber driver was fiddling with his phone - shaking  wiping , putting it near his cheeks and ears .

“Sorry Mam, I cannot go. Please cancel this ride and get another one “,  the driver said .

“What ! But Why ?  It is raining so heavily , can’t you see ?  And I have a doctor’s appointment at 8 pm ! “

“Mam, I can go but you will have to tell me the directions.  GPS is not working because phone is damaged. It fell into a puddle when I was helping the earlier passenger with her bags.”

“Oh God !” I groaned. 

I tried to open the net but by that time it has started raining cats and dogs. My current location was below a flyover and there was almost no network. And the torrential rain made the connectivity almost nil.

I was really flabbergasted. 

I was going to this doctor for the first time. In the morning , my husband had asked me to look up the direction on google maps but I had refused.

“I will anyways get an Uber . With technology , I don’t even have to communicate with the chauffeur. I will reach on time. Don’t you worry !” I had laughed.

I never imagined that my laugh will cost me so heavily !  

And at that moment, I truly realized the extent of our  dependency on technology.  

Or you can call it on Artificial Intelligence.

Artificial Intelligence, Machine Learning and now the most recent , Deep Learning

Let me first try to explain these in layman terms.

Artificial Intelligence is the broad umbrella term for attempting to make computers think the way humans think, be able to simulate the kinds of things that humans do and finally the machines  solve problems in a better and faster way than we do. 

John McCarthy, widely recognized as one of the godfathers of Artificial Intelligence (AI), defined AI as “the science and engineering of making intelligent machines that have the ability to achieve goals like humans do. In short, Artificial Intelligence is human intelligence exhibited by Machines.

In fact AI has been around for quite a while. Though the term  Artificial Intelligence was coined at the Dartmouth Conference in 1955, simple things like computers, calculators, computer games , washing machine, dishwasher – anything which the machine does faster and better than human beings comes under the umbrella of Artificial Intelligence.  

It was only since 2015, the domain of AI  started becoming more focused and narrow. 

This gave birth to Machine  Learning . The idea behind Machine Learning is fairly simple.

Rather than programming computers to be smart by hand-coding software routines with a specific set of instructions to accomplish a particular task, you give machines access to a large number of sample data and code them to find patterns and learn on their own how to perform the task. 

Machine Learning is built based on algorithmic approaches that over the years included decision tree learning, inductive logic programming, clustering, reinforcement learning, Bayesian networks etc.

Let me try to make it  simpler. 

When I taught the English Alphabets to my daughter - ,A for Apple, B for Ball, C for Cat,   I did not tell her the algorithm to identify the features and then decide what is it. I simply showed her the picture of an apple , a ball  and a cat.  When I bought fruits , I showed her apples - some green , some red. When I went to the park as saw a cat sitting there, I held her hands and  said “ See , a Cat !” . 

So when she saw multiple examples of the  object and then her human brain automatically identified the features so that her brain could identify that object

This is  exactly what a Machine Learning Model does. Human brain is a machine par excellence. The Same thing is simulated in Machine Learning.  Huge amount of data is fed into the computer and after analysis of the data, prediction can be made and some action is taken.  

Google uses Machine Learning to filter out spam messages.  Amazon and other top technology driven e-commerce sites use machine learning wand data analytics to advertise their goods based on what the algorithm predicts about your needs and tastes.

Now about  Deep Learning. This is even more focused and intense , the next level of AI.

Deep learning was inspired by the structure and function of the brain, namely the interconnecting of many neurons. Neural Networks are algorithms that mimic the biological structure of the brain. In the brain, the neural points are physically spaced out, but in Deep learning, there are layers of neural network. 

Deep Learning can be explained as a system of probability. Based on a large dataset you feed to it, it is able to make statements, decisions or predictions with a degree of certainty. So the system might be 63% confident that there is a cat on the image, 81% confident that it’s an animal and 4% confident it’s a toy. Then you can add on the top of it a feedback loop, telling the machine whether it decisions were correct. That enables learning and possibility to modify decisions it takes in the future.
Again I will try to make it simpler.  
Suppose there is a traffic signal detector installed in a driver less car . After processing billions and trillions of data, the first layer will decide that there is a probability of 81 % that there is a rectangle . This  decision will passed on to the next layer of the neural network which will again process a humongous amount of data and give a signal to the next layer that there is a 72% probability that the rectangle is a traffic signal with red , yellow and green light on it. This then goes to the next layer and to the next and so on.  

Finally the signal detector will take a decision whether to drive ahead or not. And  it will take back data cues whether the decion was correct or not and improve itself for doing better next time. 

As in my previous example of teaching alphabets to my daughter, Deep Learning can be compared to the  way she became capable of learning from mistakes and constantly improving. Like when she called  the dog a cat  and she got a poor grade in her test,  she was given the feedback, she corrected herself and improved . She then became capable of learning new objects on her own.   
Deep learning is being implemented for driver less cars, face recognition,  pattern recognition, forecasting, the list is huge.  
The future is wide.  But somehow I tremble at the thought of the future.  

When I start thinking , I am scared. 

Will machines replace human beings ? Already we are at a stage where for several tasks, we trust the machine more.  Earlier, for giving loans, the data was analysed by human beings for deciding whether to give the loan or not. But nowadays, the banks rely on the computer algorithm , which scans and processes huge amount of data and tells us whether to process the loan or not.  

If you ask the bank why your loan was not sanctioned, they might just shrug their shoulders and say – I don’t know but the computer said so ! 

 And like by Uber driver refused to complete my ride because of a technological glitch,  will a time come when machines will literally rule us ?

In the Industrial Revolution when F.W Taylor came up with the scientific model of management,  it gave rise to processes and greater productivity. But assembly line production in factories, created jobs too. 
But with Artificial Intelligence,  the human jobs might be completely eliminated
And it's not just in factories, but truckers, drivers and even jobs like telesales, customer service and hematologists as well as radiologists over the next 15 years are going to be gradually replaced by artificial intelligence.
 Sundar Pichai, the CEO of Google has said that “in the next 10 years it will be AI first !” .
AI is cheaper and more productive . It doesn’t sleep, need breaks, get sick or take vacations, and it doesn’t need health insurance or retirement benefits. It can work 24X7, faster, better and accurately. With Deep Learning, AI can  quickly acquire and learn new skills too  without making mistakes ! 
Isn’t this too scary ?

I know that repetitive and boring jobs will be replaced by AI. But many learned people have predicted that by 2050, there will a big chunk of people who will not only be unemployed but also unemployable !  
So what will happen to my economically poor housemaid,  my not so intelligent, personal driver  and the good natured neighborhood carpenter ? How will they sustain themselves ? 
AlphaGo is a computer program that plays board game.  It has been developed by Google’s DeepMind, using Deep Learning.  
Reently AlphaGo defeated the world champion Ke Jie.   

And how Ke Jie cried ! 
With all these technological advances, have we become happier than our forefathers ?  I really don't think so ! 
We have already lost simple joys of life like receiving letters  from our dear ones and preserving them for later. Many a times I have taken out the  bundle of letters written by my husband during our courtship days , read and re read them , feeling the written word, smelling the musty smell of  the paper. 
The  joy of waiting for my Uncle coming to visit us, running towards the gate whenever I heard the sweet tinkle of the bell of the rickshaw , cursing the train service for being late and then jumping with joy when he scooped me in his arms when he finally came home
Simple thing like peeking out of the taxi window to ask a shopkeeper or a passerby about an address location and smiling back at him.
In these interesting times, will a time come when humanoids will exist together with human beings ? 
It is already a reality.
Sofia, the first humanoid robot , made her first public appearance in 2016. 
She is a doe eyed woman with delicate features, designed to look like Audrey Hepburn. 
AI allows her to hold eye contact, recognize faces and understand human speech. Cameras within Sophia's eyes combined with computer algorithms allow her to see. She can follow faces, sustain eye contact, and recognize individuals. She is able to process speech and have conversations using a natural language subsystem. She has become a citizen of Saudi Arabia  !
Ke Jie cried when he lost the game to AlphaGo. He loved his game so much that it broke his heart.  
Did AlphaGo feel  pleasure or happiness when it won ?  Definitely not .  
And Sophia, she might become super intelligent but her deadpan voice tone, mechanical facial expression will never be able to replicate the rush of Adrenalin and the heavenly emotions of love, pain and joy.
We are  living in very interesting times.  Let us see what holds in the future. Maybe it will be like what Charles Dickens had  expressed  in the immortal opening lines of  his novel - The Tale of Two cities  
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope…..
Let us hope for the best !